And it's the stars, the stars that lie to you.

[neverheardofhim]

[This week, Varric opted to take a page from Vanille’s book. Gathering everyone together after the roller-coaster that the first trial had been proved to be somewhat cathartic for himself. He hoped that it would prove to do the same for the others.]

[He wasn’t alone, of course, having found himself blessed with the most ragtag team of chefs and party-planners. He might have had words for and thoughts on Elda and Kimbley, Mikazuki was welcome company, and he wasn’t about to turn away potential allies, even in a fight as simple as cooking dinner.]

[Once everyone’s set to a task, baking a cake, brewing tea, or stirring stew (the only task Varric could think to assign Elda to), Varric excused himself to his room. His first task was writing up cards, each personally titled and signed by Varric.]

Food in the Library. 5 p.m. Don’t spend the night alone.

[Each note was slid under a door and accompanied by a single rap on the wood.]

[With his tasks completed, Varric returned to the kitchen to put out any potential fires and, with luck, set the food out. A table in the library would be adorned with plenty of tea, cake, pancakes courtesy of Viktor, and stew thanks mostly to Varric (sorry, Elda).]

Comments

Kitchen

[elepe]

[Lusamine was honestly going to grab something to drink that wasn't tea--tea was nice, but it's been ruined for a little while. So when she sees Gangrel in the kitchen, she's a little surprised.

...But after a few moments, she just walks over to get what she needs, looking at what he's making.]

There's perfectly good cake down at the library, you know.

[plegia]

[Well, he's just heating up cream puffs so he's not actually doing any work, but you know what, here we are.

He glances up at Lusamine for a moment while he debates whether or not he has the energy to antagonize her. He eventually decides that no, he doesn't, and shrugs.]

I'm sure there is. I don't want to be around everyone for a little bit, though.

[He's also going to go pester Killia, because being mad with Killia for awhile should reset whatever went wrong in his head.]

[elepe]

[...that's honestly the surprising part. Goodness, just how terrible must his teeth be if this is all he knows how to do.

Either way, Lusamine's not exactly in the mood for that either and nods her head.]

Understandable.

[She'll just grab some juice and leave it at that for a moment. Once that's taken care of, though--]

You should be certain to grab something else before the evening chime, then. I doubt those will be enough.

[plegia]

...You don't have to remind me. I have taken care of myself since I was a child, you know.

[It doesn't have any of the usual bite, which is kind of irritating.]

[elepe]

I'm simply wondering if that's all you know how to cook.

[...this is kind of why she'd left the party, not just for a drink but because everything was so somber--it's weird. Stop being weird, Gangrel.]

[plegia]

Oh, I can cook. I just don't know how to use most of these.

[Handwave indicating all the appliances.

Give him an open fire and he can at least provide for himself!! BUT HE'S USELESS HERE. And he's been mooching off of people because that is absolutely the best way to ensure his survival for the least amount of effort!!]

[elepe]

[...Gangrel jesus christ, she was impressed for all of a second before you indicated the fact that you apparently...cook like a caveman? What year do you even come from, sir.

Either way, eyebrow...quirking aside, she takes a sip of her drink before responding.]

Have you checked the library for anything that might assist you in this matter? Or even asked someone to help?

[plegia]

[it's rough in fire emblem....]

Hanyuu taught me a bit. As long as there's someone else around to cook and I can watch them do it, why bother looking for books on the subject?

[elepe]

Do you take any value in your independence?

[That's...kind of an answer she didn't expect from him, actually. A ruthless king was one thing, and it implied he got stuff done. But a man who can't even cook for himself?]

[plegia]

[. . .]

I lead an entire country and you're asking me if I value my independence? I wouldn't be a king if I didn't, now would I?

[COOKING DOESN'T COUNT]

[elepe]

Oh, you know exactly what I mean! [Goddammit Gangrel.] Your independence as a king and your independence as a person are two completely different things.

[That being said...]

So, what happens if all of the people who cook for you are killed or executed in the next week? You can't tell me that you would survive off of those pastries forever...

[plegia]

[siiiiiiiiigh]

What do you want me to say, that I'd simply let myself starve to death? Please. I'd simply pick it up as I went! I've done it plenty of times before!

[elepe]

[Yeah, he's getting that right back at him.]

I'm implying that it's not nearly as much of a chore as you're making it out to be. If you actually took the time to learn, you would probably find it enjoyable to get something that isn't more artificial than Christo's horns in your mouth.

[...that was a tad tactless, but you know what, she doesn't really care.]

[plegia]

Are you kidding me? We never have anything this sweet, it's wonderful!

[His priorities are looking great today but LISTEN. PLEGIA IS A DESERT. HE CANNOT HAVE CREAM PUFFS 24/7!!]

[elepe]

...Is that the reason you're fighting so hard about this? Because Tapus forbid that you balance your sweet tooth out before you weigh ten tons?

[Pffffffft.]

[plegia]

...What is a Tapu.

[Once again, exactly the wrong thing to get stuck on, but here we are.]

[elepe]

The guardian deities of my home. Gods, if you're so inclined to call them that.

[...your priorities, Gangrel...]

[plegia]

...Gods. Well, what kind of gods are they?

[elepe]

They are the guardian deities of Alola's four islands, and the highest power in the land. Very fickle ones, according to legend. They are just as likely to help the people out as they are to simply follow their own desires, and they are known for being rather finicky creatures. They make the decisions of the land, and we worship them and abide by their words.

Those who don't are swiftly shown their place on the island.

[Like that poor Thrifty Megamart. Rest in pieces, now abandoned lot.

...and her tone isn't exactly the most reverent, but there you go.]

[plegia]

Fickle's certainly better than a god of annihilation. Grima's a piece of work.

[i mean. not that he's actually met grima. grima is actually a piece of work, but he's just mad about the grimleal.]

[elepe]

...A god. Of annihilation.

[...

so how does Grima feel about head-it]

It sounds rather ghastly. Dare I ask what it did to earn that moniker?

[Other than y'know. Annihilating shit, clearly.]

[plegia]

[i can't believe lusamine's gonna pet grima]

Well, if you believe the tales - and I certainly don't - then a thousand years or so ago Grima made a pact with someone and tried to destroy the world. But he was defeated by the first Exalt - that's the ruler of the Ylisseans - and Naga, some kind of divine dragon or something.

[Handwave. Who cares about Naga, she probably won't be important.]

Anyway, with the world saved the Ylisseans continued existing, unfortunately, and the insane Grima cult founded a country so they could continue being insane without fearing the Ylisseans thoughts on their warped religious beliefs.

[...]

And that's the history of Plegia!

[oh my fuckin' god]

[elepe]

[horrifying abominations: gotta catch 'em all!

...but okay, Lusamine just. Listens to that for a moment, eyebrow quirking higher and higher while the seconds go by and she listens to this.

When she finally speaks up;]

So you run a cult of mad men dedicated disguised as a country of people.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised...

[plegia]

I don't run the cult! Don't insult me like that!

[...because apparently that's an insult...??]

I'm the King of Plegia, but I'm not the leader of the Grimleal. I don't even believe in any of that nonsense!

[dragon god and reviving him and dark magic and blah blah blah sacrificing yourself for an evil dragon or something who knows]

[elepe]

What was I supposed to think, when you said it like that?

[He certainly looked the part. Probably only a puppet king while the real one lays waiting for him to fuck up or some shit!!

...Even still, Lusamine pauses for a moment before a smile starts to creep on her face.]

You're an atheist, then?