[ The question, How do you keep yourself composed?, he supposed maybe he shouldn't tell her how he was this morning for quite awhile, because he wasn't very composed there either. He's never really lost anyone he loved romantically, but he's honestly putting up a front of some kind to get himself through this. He's ... not exactly pretending everything is fine, but he's trying to look forward.

Emphasis on 'trying'. ]

Ah well...I used to just take it whenever I lost someone -- at that time I could hardly do much without a human form anyway. Most of the time I was just on display, but a lot of things happened before my eyes, whether or not I was taken into battle. When you watch people kill each other in front of you, argue, backstab one another...and you can't do much other than be a witness, you do ... get used to it. Even if it's someone "important".

I did have friends, though. So, I did tell myself as long as I had someone by my side, I'd be able to get through it all.

But, now... even I still need a little help. I need to make sure I'm looking ahead, or someone is nearby. It's not easy, but it really does help if you let someone in.

[ He doesn't say that it doesn't always work. That either of them might just slip up and fuck up anyway, crashing down hard one day. Because that doesn't help, so now he'll try to bring her into a hug. ]