I'll wait, so show me why you're strong

[isafraid]

[And so the day's trial for the attempted murder of Gabriel Knight draw to a close with... charitably better results then usual.

They were alive, at the least, but that didn't mean there wasn't several blows against the trust that had been built up here. One mole that attempted murder, another that quit, and another that was given the offer no doubt put strain on several relationships... most notably Sigrun's.

It was all, in a word... frankly shitty. But now it's all out there, no sense in trying to get it back.

An hour (or two) after the "trial" ends and everyone's gone off on their own business, Speedwagon heads back to the kitchen. It was the usual plan in mind, what they did after every trial. And everyone, regardless of what was said or done, would soon find a note being slipped under their door.]

[Name],
There's gonna be food in the dining hall, in case anyone's got an appetite for it.
I know some might want to be alone after that mess of an investigation, but if you don't then the offer's as open as it's always been.
I'd say sticking together might still be safer then not.

-R E.O. Speedwagon

[And yes, folks that arrive in the dining hall will find a nice spread of sandwiches, soup, and what leftovers Speedwagon could scrounge out of the fridge. Speedwagon isn't the best cook in the group, but there's definitely stuff here that's good enough to eat.

...Sigrun's 'masterpiece' was, thankfully, left out of this. Keeping folks alive is the goal, after all.]

Comments

[goodforsomething]

Naaaah, not really.

[Stan falls silent for a moment. He knows how to pull one over on people, how to manipulate them into buying his product. It's actual genuine feelings that give him trouble. You can't just con someone into feeling better; it's not that simple.]

If you need anythin' from me, you just ask, okay?

[amygdalae]

[There's a pause after that, and really, had he been a lesser man Bruce would have... done something regrettable, probably. He doesn't know exactly what, but it wouldn't have been pleasant for anybody involved.

Still, he knows better. And its not a matter of being a better man (because he isn't, he never will be, not like this) but rather reminding himself again that nobody benefits. It's only a moment of petty satisfaction and nothing more and that? Isn't worth it.]

...okay. [Is what he does eventually say, after a pause, and then another passes before Bruce picks up the bottle and takes another drink from it.]

[goodforsomething]

[Stan watches him a moment longer, then gives a short nod and turns to go. He's not helping this; he's liable to make it worse the more he stands around and pokes at it.]

I'm sorry, for my part in all that. Realized I never really said it. [He'd explained himself, but he'd never actually just apologized.]

[amygdalae]

[...Bruce sighs loudly at that, bringing the bottle back down again. It's... he doesn't know what to feel right now, honestly. Its the kind of mess that comes because he's feeling far too much and he's never had that good of a handle of his emotions. Anger, rage, pain--those he knows because he's lived with it for so long. But this... its something else. It's pain and anger and rage, but in another form. One that breaks him from the inside every single time.]

It's not like I didn't expect this to happen. [The worry was always there, at the back of his mind, but he couldn't be sure at all until Mettaton happened. And then after that he had been more certain, though Aiden was a bust so he had thought that perhaps...

How very wrong he was.]

I prepared myself for that eventuality a long time ago. [Because betrayal is always a thing for him so it just makes sense to be ready for it, to know that its there so that the pain will sting less. And he was prepared... he just was never prepared for what Sigrun did. Funny how that works.]

[goodforsomething]

Smart. I always figured he had more than me, but I thought after Mettaton, it was over. Should've known better.

[Well. No sense kickin' himself about that now. It's funny, but Stan is more stung by Black's attempt on Gabriel's life than by his long betrayal of everyone. Like he said, he could've gone that way too. He gets it.]

[amygdalae]

[Bruce is more affected by the attempt on Gabriel too, honestly. Which is a bit terrible in and of itself... or perhaps for the better, since Bruce has never been that close to Black. If anything its Yosuke who's suffering the most right now.

(Why did they all even risk their emotions like this? Bruce wishes he could do the same, in a way. But he can't.)]

...I wasn't sure until him, actually. [Until that point he had nothing to prove himself and his (presumably now justified) paranoia.] But after him, I knew there was more. I just couldn't think who else would be able to do it.

[After all its not as if... Bruce allowed himself to try and get close to anybody. For this reason, and for many others. And then he was trying with Sigrun, and looked where that got him.]

[goodforsomething]

Heh. Yeah...

[There's no humor in his tone. Who would be able to, indeed?]

...dunno if I would've pinned Black.

[amygdalae]

[Bruce just kind of shrugs here. There's a bit of a pause before he can speak again.]

Everyone had some degree of suspicion upon them. [And that is a brief glimpse into his world, a world where he has nobody to trust and nobody he can depend on. Not because he has anything against them, but its just how things are for him.] None of us are truly innocent, in the end.

[They all sent people to die here, using their lives to extend their own in this terrible place. Because they all could have chosen to not play and die for it, but... they didn't. They made the choice to send them to die and that weighs on Bruce in his every waking moment.]

[goodforsomething]

We're all too old for that. [Even Yosuke, really.] I'm glad, though. Can't imagine the bastard bringin' kids into this.

[Stan, truly, doesn't feel an enormous amount of guilt over the culprits. If they didn't want to get executed, they shouldn't have gone and killed people. Everyone knew the terms and made their choices.

Except possibly Norman. Insanity's a hell of a defense.

It's all the Kingmaker anyway. Not like they formed a torch mob on their own.]

[amygdalae]

[God, kids... children. Bruce doesn't even want to think about that, honestly. It's far too cruel and just reminds him of... a lot of other things he'd rather not think about right now.]

I suppose that's one good thing. [The fact that there aren't any children. Bruce is pretty sure its because the Kingmaker doesn't want to deal with kids but its still a blessing, regardless.] Nobody that young should suffer through this.

[It'll break them apart. Ruin them forever. Bruce knows this all too well.]

[goodforsomething]

I expected to see 'em in those pictures. That other Vault. But nah.

[Stan folds his arms, looking bothered despite what should have been good news.]

...he had one of my employees, though. Soos. Kid's worked for me since he was twelve.

[amygdalae]

[Since twelve, huh...]

...how old is he now?

[He clearly must not be twelve anymore, not that its anything hard to figure out.]

[goodforsomething]

Twenty-two. He couldn't really hurt anybody...

[Soos does not belong in a place like this, too pure]

[amygdalae]

We know the Kingmaker doesn't care about that.

[...and a place like this can bring out the worst in people (or the best, depending on your perspective), as evidenced... well, many times.]

[goodforsomething]

Yeah, I know.

[He's been worrying about it since - even more than Ford, possibly. He's got fears there too, but in the end he knows his brother can look after himself. Not like he'd want Stan's concern anyway.]

Probably fake anyway.

[amygdalae]

...I'm pretty sure they are.

[If only because Bruce can't think of any reason at all why Tony would be in those photos. After what happened its not as if Bruce wants to have anything else to do with him.]

[goodforsomething]

Yeah...seems like he would've brought it up before now.

[amygdalae]

It would have been the easiest card to pull.

[goodforsomething]

Folks'll do a lot to save the people they care about. Even the best kind.

[amygdalae]

Love always motivates people to do anything.

[Black wasn't wrong on that point, at least.]

[goodforsomething]

Heh. Ain't that the truth.

[Stan can think of people he'd kill for, or people whose crimes he'd hide. None of them are here. He's got people he cares about in the Vault, sure, but no single one of them is important enough that he'd put all the others at risk.

How long before he ends up pulling the same shit as Sigrun? How long before they all do?]

...you oughta drink some water. You're gonna have a nasty hangover tomorrow.

[amygdalae]

[Bruce can picture a few scenarios where the want to do it is tempting, but he doesn't know if he could ever go through with it. For him nothing is worth the price of almost any kind of life. He'd rather bear the burden than to relieve it by killing another. He's already killed so much.

A pause, and then he nods to Stan's words.]

I know. [He is still a doctor after all... in some fashion anyway.] I'll be alright.

[Or at least some fashion of 'alright'. Eventually.]

[goodforsomething]

...sure. Okay.

[Stan doesn't entirely buy that, but he's not going to babysit Bruce all night. Seems condescendin', and anyway he gets wanting some time alone.]

Get some sleep, doc. [That seems more natural to say than "good night".]

[amygdalae]

[To that Bruce manages a small nod.]

I'll see you in the morning.

[At least in that way its a promise that he won't be doing anything foolish... well, too foolish anyway. At least nothing life-threatening, because nobody needs to deal with that right now.]