pick a god and pray

[garudynamic]

[Like the weeks before, once everyone has wandered off their separate ways, notes are posted to each room that still has a warm body in it. Only this time the writing is much messier then any other notice]

None of us feel like celebrating, but I think Yato would approve if we don't spend the night hiding out because of him
There's warmed up food in the Game Room if you're hungry. Might be best to not be alone tonight.

-Yosuke

[And as promised there's leftovers in the Game Room; and eventually fresh stuff as Tarrlok gets to work in the kitchen. Yosuke is there, trying to set something up on one of the shelves, but otherwise you are left to your own devices]

Comments

[cherryblooded]

[To be fair, Cherryblod doesn't know what to do with his, either. A part of him is angry, but mostly he's just - upset with himself, for not realizing, and with Mettaton for even considering, and with the Kingmaker for putting that decision in their hands-]

Why?

[It's all he can manage to say.]

[ratingspoint]

[And Mettaton just kind of shrugs at that, and judging from the fact that he expression doesn't falter any and his tone doesn't dampen itself, he doesn't really see why that's even a question.]

It's not like it matters, sweetheart, because nothing happened! I'm fine.

[cherryblooded]

It matters to me!

[Oh okay, there's the anger, right there.]

It matters that you decided that your life was worth giving up for the sake of somebody else's, that you thought we would be okay with this plan, that you could sit there all of last night and not even tell me you were planning to die!

[ratingspoint]

[And that gets him to flinch a little, his gaze dropping elsewhere, but even so this isn't really a point he's going to back down on, judging from the conviction in his voice when he answers.]

It wouldn't have mattered whether the rest of you were okay with it - it would have been done and that would have been the end of it! None of you would have had to die; it's like Yato said, it would have been a relief for almost everyone here, and you can't possibly tell me it wouldn't have been. Oh, yes, all of you say nice things about everyone getting out of here alive, but you're all missing the part where this week, someone would have died no matter what we did.

What would you have even done if I told you?

[cherryblooded]

Made you take it back, or else put in my own name - what do you mean that would be the end of it? Do you think we'd just forget that someone dear to us decided we were more important than his own survival? Do you think I'd forget you and go on with my life?

There's nothing relieving about somebody else sacrificing themself for you!

[ratingspoint]

Unfortunately, darling, this wasn't about you - or, well. I guess I should say it was about you, just not entirely.

[...There is some serious, serious empathy failure happening here, and he knows it, but he's still not seeming interested in standing down.]

I told you that it was one in five for me, didn't I? Something like that.

[cherryblooded]

I'd bet anything that all of those people agree with me. If you cared enough about them to consider throwing your life away, then they care enough about you to wish you hadn't.

[ratingspoint]

It's not "throwing my life away" - don't call it that.

[cherryblooded]

What do you want me to call it?

[ratingspoint]

Not that? How should I know?

[It's agitated, though; there's something in the back of his mind that's bothering him, though he'll...push it away after a while - now isn't the time.]

There are times when it's worth it, you know. And if this was going to be one of those times, then it's not wasting anything.

[cherryblooded]

...I know that.

[He does. He really does. It's not the first time self-sacrifice has been brought up to him as an idea.]

But I can't stand how you're acting like it would be no big deal. Like I wouldn't be feeling pain over it decades from now.

[ratingspoint]

[Oh, for fuck's sake.]

Maybe you would. Or maybe you would have died instead, and I know which I would have found preferable.

It doesn't matter now. The situation is over. Both of us are fine.

[cherryblooded]

And the next time a motive comes up like this? Apparently I just need to beat you to the punch.

[He doesn't want to die - mostly because he recognizes that would hurt the people surviving him.

But goddamn if it isn't better than losing those people.]

[ratingspoint]

[And that just gets him to pick up that sketchbook again, to go back to writing things down in it, because that's what he's decided to be today.]

...If that's what you choose to do, darling, I'm not going to stop you.

[cherryblooded]

Mettaton...

[Not a lot of progress is being made here, and Cherryblod recognizes that, but he just doesn't know what else he can do.]

...Fine. I'm sorry for wasting your time.

[He opens the door behind him. If Mettaton doesn't say anything, it's time to go and be absolutely miserable the rest of the night.]

[ratingspoint]

You aren't wasting my time.

[...]

...I told you that I have a history of being terrible to my family.

[cherryblooded]

I know that.

...I can't speak for the rest of your family, but I love you all the same, no matter how many stupid things you do.

[ratingspoint]

...If you do anything like what you just told me, I'm not going to stop you.

But I will hate you for the rest of my life. Do you hear me?

[cherryblooded]

I understand.

[...He's not going to promise not to, though.]

[ratingspoint]

Good.

If you want to leave, then go.

[cherryblooded]

...Alright.

Please take care of yourself.

[And he's going. To be slightly less than totally miserable, maybe.]