WEEK 6.

[trustwellness]

WEEK 6 With the deaths of Viktor Nikiforov, Varric Tethras, and Killia, you're down to half of your original number. There's only fifteen of you left. How much longer before your number drops again? Saturday is given to regrouping and rest; on Sunday morning the clock chimes as it always has, but at least there are no bodies to find today. It seems you're safe for now. The night before wasn't necessarily a peaceful one, however; you'll probably feel a bit groggy when you wake up, and it seems you've regained something that you didn't realize you'd lost... Of course, that doesn't mean that you've gained nothing else among the many, many losses you've faced; it seems that another floor has been made available to you for surviving another week. Congratulations and well done, even if you might not necessarily appreciate the reward. APPRENTICES REMAINING: 15

SUNDAY | MONDAY | TUESDAY | WEDNESDAY | THURSDAY

[OOC: Welcome to week six of Trustfell! Feel free to make as many top levels as you'd like and tag out to other characters! This post is for all of your interactions this week... at least until the weekend. Don't forget to save those threads for coins and the activity check!

If you'd like to get in contact with the Wordsmith, you can do so through letters or the switchboard!]

Comments

[firstaid]

[Her crying lasts for a bit, eventually calming down to a huff of breaths, and then suddenly, she's just exhausted. Though there is no denying that she feels a lot better as she rests her head on his shoulder. Her embrace on him loosens, but her fingers cling to his clothes. It's like she's silently telling him it's okay if he needs to leave, but still asking if he could stay.

As much as she wants to be alone she doesn't want to be left alone at the same time.

Maybe it's in this moment that she decides for the sake of her own mental health, that she just needs to trust Mikazuki. That he won't say painful words to her, that he won't tell her that she makes him feel guilty. Those words Killidia told her still sting, even though Killia seemed to clarify them.]

I'm sorry... for how I treated you last night and just now. I'm... just really scared.

[How many times has she told Mikazuki now that she's scared? She may be able to count it on one hand, but it also feels like she's lost count.]

[tsugomori]

[ Mikazuki doesn't pull himself away even when she loosens her embrace with him, he can only at this time, look down at her, lips turned up into another smile, and it's something that he manages at this point out of habit, almost close to how he was able to do so easily earlier in the weeks before everything took a nosedive. ]

I don't fault you for it, not at all in the slightest, so it is alright. I understand how you feel.

[ ... He really does. He doesn't want her to feel ashamed for how she feels, when they're going through things like this together. ]

I'll stay as long as you need me to.

[firstaid]

[She knows that he understands and it's probably why it caused so much confusion from her. Maybe he's smiling because he's better at this than she is, but now, it's a comfort. Just getting all that frustration out just now and not being judged for it helped more than she realized. Of course, everything still hurts, but her mind feels a lot less clouded now.

After a bit, she nods at him against his shoulder.]

Please stay with me. I... don't want to be alone right now.

[tsugomori]

Then, I will stay with you, I promise.

[ Mikazuki doesn't intend on leaving her person anytime soon, especially now that she's said that. So, it looks like they'll be together today for quite awhile, but considering the situation, he doesn't mind. ]

Is there anything you would like to talk about? Or, would you like for us to go get some tea?

[firstaid]

[She remains there still, her embrace becoming a little tighter again.]

I... don't really know.

[No, she does know...]

I want to trust people here, but I'm so afraid they will betray me now. I... got scared that I couldn't trust you either.

[Though could anyone really blame her for that?]

My dream... when I learned of my destiny, I fell into a slump. Taking advantage of that, one of my 'friends' had taken my hostage and given me to the commandant of the knights-- someone else I trusted. They both... ended up using me. One because of his orders, the other because I was a weapon. It was after that I apparently had wished for my friends to... to kill me... since I was under the Commandant's control.

[tsugomori]

[ Mikazuki certainly wouldn't blame her, even if it did hurt, and there had been a moment where he hadn't understood why she wouldn't. But... there were really no guarantees now, even without Estelle having that dream, weren't there.

He'll unconsciously tighten his hold on her as well, but not so it's uncomfortable. ]

...

They didn't listen to you and try to kill you, did they?

[firstaid]

I... I don't know. My dream ended after I asked... and all I heard was "I'll set you free."

[Which could very well mean that her request was heard and that she would be killed. After all, she knew Yuri would kill her if he honestly had to...]

[tsugomori]

Hrm... that is unfortunately a little vague, but -- you're still here, alive, and maybe that means they didn't try to kill you and it was just that cruel man who said something like that.

[ ... even when it's pitch black apparently Mikazuki tries to see the silver lining somewhere. ]

[firstaid]

[She shakes her head against him.]

No, I know who said it. It was a friend of mine-- the one that I requested to kill me.

[But maybe she is still alive. She really doesn't know.]

If push came to shove, I know he would do as I asked. And I'm positive it likely came to that.

[tsugomori]

But... you're still alive now, so at the very least, you lived through that.

[ Mikazuki refuses to accept any alternative, because it doesn't make sense for her to be dead, for one, and for another thing, she's someone he cares about. ]

I just wish you hadn't had to face that at all.

[firstaid]

[She'll stop talking about that and just nod. She wants to believe, but... everything is so hard right now.]

It's... okay that I had to. If it goes hand in hand with who I am as a Child of the Full Moon, then it is a fate I must face and accept.

[However, she does squeeze him tightly.]

However, thank you for wanting to believe. There's no doubt that I wish to live, however, if it came between my life and hurting my friends, I would gladly give it up for them so they can live.

[She takes a deep breath.]

But... I know something like that shouldn't be taken so lightly since the pain of losing a friend is quite unbearable.

[tsugomori]

[ '... it is a fate I must face and accept'.

Mikazuki doesn't nod, even if he understands; it's natural not to want harm to come to those you care about. It is also natural to want to protect friends at the risk of one's life, so he won't criticize it. ]

...Yes, that's right.

[ He gives her back a pat again, and he offers her a smile. ]

[firstaid]

[She loosens her embrace on him a little. Perhaps he didn't say much, but it was also better he didn't say what he was thinking given her delicate mental health at the moment.

There's also a lot on her mind, but she... just decides not to speak on it. It would only spiral back to what she was feeling earlier.

She'll eventually pull away from him, though it is tempting to just grab his hand. She wants that contact, but she won't be selfish.]

Was there anything you were planning on doing today? As... much as I don't want to be alone, I also don't wish to hog up your time.

[tsugomori]

[ Mikazuki moves to take one of her hands back in both of his with that smile of his still on his face; he doesn't let go and he doesn't say anything yet. Then, after giving it a squeeze, he will let it go. ]

I was thinking of spending more time with you later today. But right now, I think I actually do need to go and get something to eat. It'd be unfortunate if I forgot to eat something... haha.

[ ... ]

So I'll head to the kitchen and hope you do too soon, so you at least have something to eat.

[firstaid]

[She's definitely a lot calmer now. Maybe crying it out helped, maybe admitting why she was so afraid helped, there's so many different things that just caused her to implode emotionally.]

Please, go eat. Don't worry about me, I'll go to the kitchen eventually to get food.

[Maybe...

Maybe... not.]

[tsugomori]

... Alright, I believe in you.

[ Mikazuki will just come and check though anyway later after he's done just to make sure, because Estelle, pls!!

He'll move to the door, and then bow. Then, he'll finally, hesitantly leave. ]

[firstaid]

[She gives him a small wave when he bows. As soon as he leaves, she gets back up and locks the door only to go back to her bed. Maybe she'll sleep some more. Maybe she'll feel much better in the morning.]